I was recently in India for three months.. Such a beautiful place, yet I was not completely happy.. Because... well.. Long story... something has been in my heart causing a huge turbulence in my mind. So I thought that when I'd be back home everything would be better.. I would have my old friends, i would be home, and things like that... However now that I am home, i have this huge gap in me, feeling like there is something missing even here.. I can't find it anywhere.. It's annoying, cuz.. it's endless.. It feels like this urge for satisfaction is the driving force for my actions.. I miss everything about the past.. Some time ago i was happy, but it's just 'fleeting' happiness i guess.. And then i get all motivated to get on, but somehow it feels like i just get pulled back down. I wish I could get out of this endless cycle of trying to satisfy my desires and stuff, yet although i wish it so much, i also wish to get my wants and needs fulfilled. so it's both ways.. haha.
